Santa in his infinite wisdom brought the kids a Wii for Christmas and frankly that thing drives me nuts. First of all, I am a control freak. Yes, I said it. I'm not a control freak in all areas of my life (well, I make myself feel good by saying that), but when it comes to what my kids are doing - I am a little psycho. I can't stand them mindlessly playing video games (of any kind) while there is: laundry to be done, a kitchen to be cleaned, food to be cooked, a floor to be cleaned, or a carpet to be vacuumed. It makes me a little irritated. So, tonight I reached my wits end and decided to make another chore chart (we've had approximately 100 chore charts in our lives because I am inconsistent and a slacker mom). This one was to be entitled Technology Usage Chore Chart (not as daunting as it sounds - apparently).
My charts are not power point material. They are more on par with a kindergartner's presentation. For example, I made the chart with recycled paper and a thick black Sharpie (because I couldn't find a decent pen). The columns read (as far as I can remember): Make beds, fold blankets, put all lovies on beds, put clean clothes neatly away, practice piano, do homework. So, when I finished showing the kids my masterpiece and explaining all the intricacies of what must be accomplished in order for them to use technology (Wii and iTouches) here is what happened:
Boy Child: Um, mom, is there going to be a Q and A?
Boy (snickering): Mom, do you know what Q and A means? Without giving anyone a chance to answer. It means Question and Answer!
Wild laughing amongst all the children.
Me: Okay. Right. Do you guys have any questions?
Girl 1: Are we allowed to fold the blankets into origami cats?
Me (Quickly realizing I *might* be losing control.): Um. No.
Girl 2: Are we allowed to fold the blankets into triangles like they do flags? Because dad showed us how to do that one time. It's really hard, but he took the time to show us.
Me (Thank you, hubby, you are immensely helpful.): Um. No.
Girls 1 and 2: But, baby doesn't practice piano............or do homework.
Me: Fine. I'll cross those out.
Baby: YES I DO PRACTICE PIANO!!! AND I DO HOMEWORK.
Me: OKAY. Does everyone understand??? We start tomorrow. Are we all good with this???
Boy: Are we to the Q and A yet?
Me: YES for the love of God.
Boy: Okay. My question is - are you taking questions?
Again, collective snickering.
I may need to make another chart entitled Taking Mom Seriously.