A Good American - A Great Read

I am being compensated by Blogher for this book review, but the ideas and opinions expressed in this post are my own.

This book was such a pleasant surprise for me that it's embarrassing for me to think back to a couple weeks ago when I was actually dreading reading it.  Everything I read about the book beforehand made me think it was a historical novel and when I signed up to review it I half hoped I wouldn't be accepted (historical novels are not my thing at all).  I was accepted and the dreading began.  To my absolute delight, when I started reading the dread stopped right at the end of the first page.

There are so many things about this book that I loved, it was hard to decide what to choose to write about and where to start.  I decided the beginning would be a good place.  The story is narrated by the grandson of the characters who begin the novel.  Grandpa and Grandma (as they become) immigrate to America from Germany and the novel traces their voyage and subsequent life in America. 

Since I felt kind of deceived by the book blurbs I read I thought I'd write about some of the stuff I didn't read in any of the blurbs.

First:  This is a love story on so many levels.  First of all, it's a love story about the love a person has for their homeland and the love one can grow to have for their new land.  There are few people who will not be able to relate to either the immigrant experience or the non-immigrant experience of simply having a deep love for your country - or both.  The novel unfolds to also tell some fabulously unexpected love stories between characters.  It tells about the love that comes from a friend.  It explores the love that two people can have for each other that is not physical, but based on a deep friendship that crosses racial and cultural lines.  And finally it is a story about love for music.  I am not really a music lover myself, so I was surprised when I found myself interested in reading about the characters' passion for music.  If you are a music lover I think you will appreciate the part music plays in this story even more.
 
Second:  This is a coming of age novel of sorts.  The narrator goes through his teen years in detail in the novel.  This part of the story was surprising to me in the turn of subject matter from somewhat serious to teenage boyish.  It was also humorous and at the same time heart breaking.  This part of the story that dealt with coming of age in the 1950's made me think about how things have changed and how they've really stayed the same.  There were bullies then and there are bullies now.  Teen boys were hormone obsessed then and they are now.  There was illegal drinking and smoking going on then and there is still illegal substance using going on.  The intensity has changed, but the issues really haven't.  I thoroughly enjoyed this part of the novel.  I laughed and cried.

Third:  This is a story that entices the reader to continue reading.  I loved the way the progress of the characters, the progress of America, and the progress of the restaurant business all moved the story along in an absolutely enthralling way.  I admit I am a spoiler.  It's embarrassing - but I almost always read the last page of a book first and I am constantly skipping chapters to read the next chapter and then going back and reading what I skipped over.  I didn't do that this time and I am so glad!   Alex George has a clever technique of leaving the reader questioning what's going to happen next nearly at the end of each chapter.  He cleverly states things like, "The fierce love of Jette's family kept him there long after he should have been on his way."  (Italics are mine.)  This technique worked for me!  I was captivated and wondering - okay, why did he say that - what's going to happen???  I patiently read every single page.  In order.  And, there is no spoiler alert for this post, but you do not want to read the end first and if you don't read until the end you will miss what some might consider the whole point of the novel.  It is truly good until the last word.

I loved this book.  I cried through most of the last chapters and I spent the two days after I finished the novel missing the characters and wishing I hadn't finished the book so that I could read more.  I am looking forward to reading more from Alex George.                      . 

So, what can I say?  If you want a beautiful story about the human experience wrapped in a love story tied up with music and food that started with German immigrants - go out and get this book.  We will be discussing this book over on Blogher and you can follow the discussion (trust me - it's bound to be interesting) at:  https://www.blogher.com/bookclub/now-reading-good-american

Happy reading, friends!

Diary of a Submissive

It's time for another book review.  And, this one is R-rated (and a bit rambly if you've not read the book) so consider yourself warned.

Diary of a Submissive by Sophie Morgan

I am being compensated by BlogHer to review this book, but the thoughts expressed in this post are entirely my own.

Let me get this over with and say:  I did not care for this book at all.  I was interested in reviewing it because I never managed to get on the 50 Shades of Grey bandwagon and when I read that Diary was the true 50 Shades of Grey as happened to real life submissive, Sophie Morgan, I thought, "Hmm.  Here's a way for me to get in the know about sexual domination (Why?  I don't know.  Curiosity, I guess.) and hopefully read some better writing (since I'd heard from several people that the writing in 50 Shades was at times unbearable) while doing it (since Sophie Morgan is purportedly a journalist)!"

Well, sadly for me - it read like porn.  And, frankly, not the kind of porn in which I might be remotely interested.

It's the "true story" of Sophie Morgan and her descent into the life style of a sexually submissive woman.  The book is about 300 pages long and about 275 pages are dedicated to graphic detailing of her submissive experiences.  And when I say graphic - be ready to wince and possibly have to skip over parts if you are at all sensitive to reading about pain. 

I truly wish more of the book would have been devoted to her exploring the why of the situation because that's what I find fascinating and that's what I thought the book was going to delve into.  She really doesn't delve into that much at all - except to occasionally question her limits - but not really the sanity of her actions. 

The book did get me thinking and I am curious to know if and what it got others thinking about.  Here's what I was thinking about (and by no means are these perfectly sane thoughts): 

What do therapists say about submission?  What do therapists say about a man who can inflict such torture on a woman purportedly for both of their pleasure?  If a submissive can be so humiliated, debased, physically hurt, and gain sexual pleasure from that - does a submissive gain sexual pleasure from any form of pain?  What initiates a connection between the two (since her relationships were otherwise rather shallow)?  Are there people who actually do this stuff (don't answer that - I really don't want to know)???  And my frequent thought (because I have a sick, sick mind - but not sick like this chickie) - Jesus, if a submissive was ever captured and held in a prisoner war camp - they would never be able to torture her to talk.  She'd take her secrets to the grave. 

I also kept thinking:  This woman is gonna love the pain of natural childbirth.  And:  How is this different from rape?  (I suspect she would say because she was in control the whole time. My response to that is - how does she know she was in control if it never stopped and she never used her "safe word"?  What would women who have truly been sexually tortured think of this book?

While I was reading this book 50 Shades of Cain aired on Law & Order SVU.  Interestingly enough in this episode (often the episodes parallel "real life" drama) the author of a "true sexual submissive story" gets rapes and no one believes her.  Then on the show it's revealed that the book is not even true or her own work.  That got me thinking!

So, for me, this book created more questions for me than it answered.  It also left me feeling somewhat depressed, a whole lot disturbed, (like when I watched that old movie about the sex trade - can't remember the name of it and don't want to Google it ;o) and a lot like I wanted to take a bath and wash off all the nastiness.  As far as it being mommy porn (like 50 Shades was sold as) - I guess if nipple clamps and other more graphic forms of torture make you hot - yeah.  For me, no thank you.  I gave birth to four kids (three of them naturally) and that's about all the pain my hoo-ha can take for one lifetime.

If you'd like to join the discussion (which is bound to get interesting) on BlogHer here is the link:  http://www.blogher.com/bookclub/where-do-you-find-confidence.  Hope to "see" you there!

 Thanks for the read and I'll be back with a more humorous post soon!

I can die happy today. But, if not I guess I'll just catch up on laundry.

Cross this off my bucket list:  I "met" The Bloggess.  Insert huge slightly insane grin and wild laughter.  And I also met and photographed Copernicus and Juanita:

I am still pee pants excited that last night we met Jenny Lawson.  She read a hysterical chapter from her new book:  

See how mine is different from the ones on the shelf because it has my NAME on it?  *giddy smile*

If you are not familiar with Jenny Lawson (The Bloggess), you really should be.  She is an absolutely funny gal with a genuine heart.  And that is why I *might* be in love with her.  Oh, and buy her book, Let's Pretend This Never Happened because you will laugh so hard you will need to wear Depends and also Jesus recommended the book.  He says so on the back cover.  So, that's really good, right?



I had planned all these smart things to say to her when I finally got my three seconds with her.  Instead I just gazed at her and mumbled something incredibly obvious and ridiculous like, "Um, ah, I really like your blog.  Um, ah.  And you're so funny.  Uh-huh."  And she was incredibly graceful and looked at me with quiet patience and a lovely smile.



Now I am going to recover by doing some laundry.  And, oh, if I die today - it's okay.  Mission accomplished.

To read or not to read. It's not a question.

Disclaimer:  This is a paid review for BlogHer Book Club but the opinions expressed are my own.

How do you know you loved a book?  For me, it's when I finish reading the book and actually forget I am done.  I still look forward to stealing and savoring a few moments, opening the book at my well-worn book marker, and reading what happens next.  When I remember that I finished the book I briefly mourn this fact and momentarily hate the author for not continuing the book a few more chapters.  Finally, after a few days, I can remember that I am DONE with the book and rather than be sad and hateful I can just bask in the fact that I have finished another great book!  That's what happened to me with this book.

If you have not read The Weird Sisters by Eleanor Brown, I recommend it.  Since you can easily find previews and reviews of this book anywhere on the net, I am going to give you a book review in list form!  Here it goes.

Why I think you will not be disappointed with The Weird Sisters

1.  Eleanor Brown uses the uncommon "first person plural" for the voice of the novel.  Yeah, I wasn't sure what that was either.  So, if it's been a while since you were in an English class, let me just tell you that this is a voice which allows for narration by various characters (one at a time) while also using "we" in the midst of that narration.  Huh?  Just know that this is the perfect voice for a story about a family because it reminds the reader that in a family we are each our own voice, but we also speak for our collective nature and memories.  AND, you end up with some beautifully structured sentiments such as the ones in this paragraph speaking about the mother's breast cancer:    "It must be so strange, Rose thought.  We had never made much trade in our breasts, small as they were on all of us, but to lose one?  Or both?  And our mother's breasts, the ones that had fed us, against which we had cried when we were young.  Oh, it was selfish of us to think it, but we missed them as well."

2.  The book is funny in the face of some dauntingly serious topics:  cancer, pregnancy before marriage, adultery, theft.  And some less daunting but still serious topics:  love, marriage, motherhood, fathering.  I found the humor in the contemporary use of language and style which I love because it felt hip and current and yet not overtly so as if it was written by a teenager.

3.  I thought at first that the Shakespearean quotes would be too much for me.  I am no Shakespeare guru and its been about 25 years since I've read anything by Shakespeare.  So, it's amazing that I found the quotes quite delightful.  The father of the girls has made Shakespeare his life and speaks almost entirely in Shakespearean quotes.  I was pleasantly surprised to see the evolution (in my mind) of this character from "crazy bat" to loving and invested father.

4.  I think this book will resonate with many.  I don't think you have to be a sister to enjoy this novel (as the title might lead you to believe).  I am the youngest of seven incredibly close sisters, and I spent the first half of the book trying to figure out with which sister I identified.  I came along "late" in life for my mother and therefore was raised essentially as an only child, but I could not imagine any of my sisters having such deep seated resentment for my other sisters (as the sisters in the novel seem to have toward each other).  So, much of the first part of the book I spent thinking about how incredible their relationships were.  Then I spent the second half of the book being incredibly sad.  I couldn't figure out why I was so sad.  After all - it's not the saddest book I've ever read.  I know now that I was sad because I had a glimpse into what might happen to my young family (my three daughters).  I could not stop thinking about their relationships with each other, what they will remember, how it will affect them for forever.  I was profoundly affected by this realization.  This is the first novel I have read involving a family with grown children where I identified strongly with the mother character.  Now, it could be because I am getting as old as the hills (I prefer to think that's not the reason), or it could be because Eleanor Brown has an uncanny ability to put the reader into the novel (yeah, that's what it is).  Either way, this was both extremely sad for me and simultaneously gave me great hope.  It's changed the way I will view my childrens' relationships (and that is a sign of a great book!). 

5.  Although the novel focuses on three sisters, there is a beautiful love story on which the novel is written.  That back story is the love of the father and mother for each other.  We learn that this is not a love without struggles and differences, but it is a love that has endured the test of time.  This made me think of my parents' love for each other.  Their marriage was 6o+ (I don't do details too well) years old when my mother passed away and I am sure it was not without struggles, arguments, worry over their children, but beneath it all - profound love for each other.  I don't think many people find love like that.  I am not usually a sucker for romance and I don't usually cry, but this paragraph brought me to tears and made my heart smile:  "...We have always wondered why there is not more research done on the children of happy marriages.  Our parents' love is not some grand passion, there are no swoons of lust, no ball gowns and tuxedos, but here is the truth:  they have not spent a night apart since the day they married.  How can we ever hope to find a love to live up to that?"

I will refrain from commenting about the ending because I hope you put this on your Must Read list.  Should you be interested, here is a link to an awesome book club and book review group. 

http://www.blogher.com/bookclub/now-reading-weird-sisters

That's my list and I wish you happy reading!