Sunday, May 31, 2009

It's Been a While...

Ed's dad's memorial service was yesterday. And, of course, since I am a thinker - I have been thinking of death quite a bit. I am reminded of the power that death has to unite families. Death can be a family reunion that you weren't necessarily planning. The conversation is quite the same: "how long has it been?," "how old is your baby now?" "so, where are you living?" "what are you doing now?" And all the "remember when's....." The promises to keep in touch. The exchanging of phone numbers, emails, photographs.

I have also considered that in death unexpected forgiveness can occur. Fences can be mended, hatchets buried.....Not really in a outright kind of way, but more in a subtle, love for family kind of way. That's interesting to me.

I have been and remain midly terrified of death (my own personal death - because I have been and remain totally self-centered ;o) so death holds a bit of fascination for me. It seems to me that the more deaths families must endure the stronger they might potentially become at uniting while the family members are still alive. This leads me in a round about way to the fact that I have always been confused by "Live each day as if it was your last." And, of course, I've thought about it quite a bit. Afterall if it's my last what do I care? I will be dead and those who loved me will be sad or happy about how they lived their last day with me. And, then there's the mess of: what about the laundry, the groceries, etc.? So, I have thought quite a bit to revise this to "Love each day as if it was THEIR last." That seems to cover it, and right now that's all I have. ;o)