Wednesday, January 11, 2012

Clean enough.

Thanks to everyone who clicked over to A Nervous Tic Motion and read my guest post.  Thanks also to everyone who left me some comment love.  For some reason some of the comments did not appear on the site.  But, I got them through email and am grateful for you guys taking the time to read it.  Big hugs!

My mother was a Very Clean Woman. She taught me the Proper Way to clean many things. Here is just a small sample of the things that I used to know how to clean properly:
  • the toilet
  • the tubs
  • the baseboards (Who the heck cleans those things anyway?)
  • a light fixture
  • the refrigerator
  • the range hood (if that's even what that thing is called) and all its respective parts
  • the inside of the oven
  • silver (the real kind that you eat off of, not the kind you wear - because I still know how to clean that)
  • the bottoms of all my pans
  • the windows - inside and out
I am not quite sure what happened in between when I used to know how to clean and now, but now I pretty much hate to clean and quite frankly, I am not sure I even know how.  I'd rather try on bathing suits in tiny dressing rooms, with four children staring at me, bad lighting, pasty skin, and incorrect sizes (because it couldn't be I've gained weight in 20 years).  That's how much I hate to clean and am not really interested in helping myself. 

In the interest of my happiness (I think) hubby let's me have a cleaning lady.  He's such a great guy that in the past when we've had to tighten our proverbial belts (different from chastity belts, but I'm sure just as painful) he politely makes no move to "cut" the cleaning lady.  Suffice it to say:  Hubby is the best, and I pretty much love our cleaning lady.

As much as I love our cleaning lady, there are two things that have me a little worried.  1.  She does have limitations.  She clearly outlines the items she does not clean (see above list minus tubs and toilets).  And I wonder:  Is this in the hopes that the actual homeowner will manage those?  YIKES!  And, the other thing that has me a little worried:  (since I no longer really remember)  2.  I fear my children are not ever going to know the proper way to clean things. 

It seems that we may have reached a point at which my two concerns have converged in such a way that *kind of* makes me want to have a cleaning refresher course.   

My conversation with Girl 2 the other day: 
Girl 2 in kitchen gazing up toward the range hood:  Mom, what's that nasty looking thing up there?

Me:  Oh, that?  That's called a....hmm.....I think that thing's called a range hood.

Girl 2:  What's that thing inside of it that's all..........gooey?

Me:  Oh.  Hmm............that mesh looking thing?  I'm not really sure what that's called.  (I have a vision of my mom rolling over in her grave.)  Why do you want to know???

Girl 2:  Well, it looks gross.  I guess it can't be cleaned?

Me:  Hmm.  (Feeling suddenly and oddly defensive about said gooey thing or myself for not cleaning it.)  No, I think it can be cleaned.

Girl 2:  How would you clean it?

Me:  Good question.  (Thinking:  How would you clean that nasty looking thing?  But more importantly:  WHY?)  I think you could just put it in the dish washer?

Girl 2:  Hmm.  So...........I guess you just don't?

Ouch.  It would be fair to say I was hurt.  It's left me wondering a little about cleaning and the possibility that I should take it more seriously.   

But, I have decided that until she (or anyone else who lives here) discovers something else that is lacking in cleanliness, I will wait patiently for the feeling to pass and try to avoid the Range Hood.


Shannon said...

I hear ya! Cleaning blows, now two ways about it! That said I am going to be cleaning like a mad women in the morning because the embassy is updating it's housing files which means pictures have to be taken. So by two the house WILL be picture perfect. I'm betting by three it will be trashed.

The real kicker is that they are coming to take pics at 2 which is the EXACT time the bus drops off the boys. Should be all kinds of fun. When it is all said and sone I am going to have a glass (bottle) of wine. Wish me luck.

Monica said...

Cleaning has not been my friend. I remember a time when it was my friend, though. My house was fairly clean then. Now, the house is clean for about two hours AFTER house cleaner (same woman - God bless her soul) leaves. Then the kids (or E.) mess it up. :o( Totally understand the plight of pictures and kids arriving simulataneously. yeah. Good luck with that!!! ;o)

Anonymous said...

That is hysterical! I grew up with a mom who never cleaned - and who didn't have a maid, either. So, that's my excuse for being horrible at cleaning. And the vicious cycle continues...

Monica said...

@whatimeant2say - if it weren't for vicious cycles there would be no cycles at all. right? it would almost be easier if my mom had been a horrible cleaner...and i wasn't catholic. see, there's just way too much guilt floating around here. ;o)

cb said...

that gooey thing can be bought dont clean it
and i use to clean baseboards till someone said you dont need to clean come to the park instead, then tells me i cant go home my cleaning lady is there wow that was back in the day