Tuesday, May 15, 2012

Open Letter to My Blog (No, I don't want a divorce.)

Dear Blog,

I love you.  I really do.  I thought I would send you a quick post to apologize for neglecting you these past few weeks.  I was truly not trying to lead you on those many times that I clicked on you with the intention of "logging in" and writing a quick yet hilarious, up-beat post and then quickly had to log off in order to:  A.  Run into the bathroom to wipe a three year old butt, B.  Answer the house phone and cell phone at the same time only to find out a politician was calling on one line and my hubby was calling on the other line - - to ask me where his cell phone was, or sometimes to C.  Supervise piano practices when the competition is days away and WE STILL HAVE NOT MEMORIZED OUR PIECES (and by "we" I mean "my THREE KIDS").

No, it is not that I want to break up with you or that I want to write other blogs.  It is not even that our relationship has become dull and that maybe we need to change our layout or edit our favicon.  I am perfectly happy with you and the way you look (don't change for me!). 

In fact, I love the way you blink at me when I bring up my home page.  I love the way I click on you and then I scroll down and you let me know which of my blogging friends has posted.  I love the way you don't get pissed when I read all my friends' posts and then abruptly leave you before I have even logged in and updated you.  I love the way you keep coming back even after I abandon you on the screen for hours at a time hoping that I can come back to you while you gaze (lovingly?) at me paying bills, hauling loads of laundry, furiously cooking up a meal two minutes before I need to serve it, tediously slaving away on a Business Plan, even opening another page in order to research $hit for the Business Plan (Oh, the betrayal.  I know.)  Please know that I would soooo rather be with you.

The simple explanation for my behavior is that the people I am seeing and the things I am doing are eating up all the time I used to have for you.  Even though the Business Plan is stuffy, inflexible, incredibly boring, and just plain tedious, I have to do it.  Even though the hubby is disorganized and grumpy, I have to talk to him and I love him, too (you knew that when you and I entered into this relationship, right?).  Even though the kids are whiny and outrageous, I have to tend to them.  Even though the laundry is smelly and distasteful, I have to do it.  And, we all know - the food does not cook itself (for the eight hundredth time).  Groan.

I guess what I am trying to say is, "I can't quit you, A Day in the Life!"  We are meant for each other.  You are Romeo and I am Juliet (except we don't die at the end and we speak plain English - well, most of the time).  Please, just give me one more chance and I promise I will make it up to you.  I beg you to keep "updating me" on my favorite blogs, keep showing your sweet ads, keep blinking at me from my home page because I need that.  It will make a difference, I promise.  I will find time for you.  WE CAN MAKE IT WORK!

I will end by saying, I love you with all my fingers.  I am ready to crank out the posts (starting tomorrow) (and I bought you a new mouse!).  You have my heart (and the good side of my brain)!

Sincerely (and xoxo),

Your Writer

P.S.  Do you think we need counseling?  No.  Me neither.  Pretend I didn't mention it!


Jae said...

LOL! I think a chapter from your do-it-yourself therapy book will suffice! You two ARE made for each other! :)

Monica said...

Hahaha! Oh my that made me laugh. sadly that gem of a book is gathering dust. the horrors! BLech! I miss procrastination.

jamiew said...

You had me at "dear blog"

Monica said...

@jamiew - and i hope with the p.s., too.

Shannon said...

I am so glad you are not getting a bloggy divorce AND you are making me feel guilty because you are updating so much more often than I am. I don't even have the Business Plan or piano excuse. Miss ya!

Monica said...

@shannon - oh, girl. i miss you soooooooo much. went to the river on mother's day (which belated happy mother's day, BTW) and it was so fabulous. only y'all were missing. :o( need to get off my arse and email you. xoxo.

Anonymous said...

Awww. How could A Day in the Life not love someone with such a way with words?

Anonymous said...

Some people's kids!

Leigh Powell Hines (Hines-Sight Blog) said...

Just caught up on your posts. I'm glad you had so much to do because I can't keep up with daily posts. :)

Today's post about Girl 3 is pretty funny. We had to have an "action" plan for Baby Diva because she was being aggressive for awhile. She calmed down, and luckily, someone else took the aggressive place.

Shannon said...

You know you can always use the (GASP) phone!!! My number hasn't changed.

Monica said...

@whatimeant2say - how kind! especially coming from a fab writer like you! @myhusband - hehehehe. @leigh - thanks, leigh. i am REALLY hoping she can get it together. we had been doing a chart (soooo much work) which was working, and we may have to go back to that for summer. :o( @shannon - did i say, "i love you?" because i kinda do. ;o)