Tuesday, September 24, 2013

I predict a long future of living at home.

You may want to read about this before reading this post.  Or, if you're not all that into reading feel free to just forge ahead.

Considering the transition to middle school has been a bit rough, I was giving Boy Child the "run down" on the way to the bus stop this morning.

Me:  Do you have your lunch?  Your homework?  Your gym clothes?  Your sax?  Your Essential Elements book?  DO YOU HAVE EVERYTHING?

Boy Child:  Jeez.  Yes, mom.  I have everything.  Oh!  I forgot to tell you something important!  I can't believe I almost forgot!

Me:  Let me guess - you have an important paper for me to sign?

Boy Child:  No, jeez.  I said important, mom.  Guess what happened yesterday!

Me:  Can't wait to hear.

Boy Child:  I SAW A UFO.

Me:  Really?  Really, son.  You saw a UFO?

Boy Child:  Yes!!!

Me:  Okay!  Have a great day at school!  I love you!

Boy Child (looking at me with a look that is usually reserved for cancer and death):  Wait.  I read this book one time and....

Me:  WAIT!  I know what you're going to say.  The book had the phone number to call if you saw a UFO?

Boy Child:  Jeez, mom.  How'd you know that?  That's kinda creepy the way you did that.  Yeah, I really wish I had that number now.

Me (rife with sarcasm):  Yeah, now would be the perfect time to report.

Boy Child (with a look of insane seriousness):  No kidding!  I gotta get that book back!!!!

P.S.  I walked back in the house and found his lunch sitting on the kitchen table.

P.S.S.  Just found Essential Elements on the table.  Cheese N. Rice.
Or maybe you will?



jamiew said...

Oh, I 'm predicting the same for mine. maybe we can get them to be roomies, but whose basement/garage/storage shed can we put them in?

Shannon said...

Maybe we should just buy a house maybe up near Ms. Cyn and let them all room together because I tell you mine are just as bad. Oh and you should send him to the SETI web site, or make him a hat out of tinfoil, whichever.

Just to make you feel better:
Conversation last night while making sure that the 7th grader was ready for school the next morning.

Dave: Let me see your day planner (flips to page for the day, looks at child like he is an idiot) it's blank.
Child: So? I know what I have for homework.
Dave: So what did you have for homework?
Child: Study Arabic, write a summary about this article in Nat Geo.
Dave: So why did you bring home your science book and your Math book?
Child I don't know.
Dave: Do you have homework in science or math?
Child: No
Dave: Where is your arabic?
Child: I left it at school.
Dave: (Face turning red) So how are you going to do your homework?
Child: (Tears streaming down his face) Why do you have to treat me like a baby? I am not a baby!


Shannon said...

You should go read this http://wellthatwasdifferent.wordpress.com/2013/09/22/reasons-my-teenager-is-being-repressed/

Too funny, frighteningly true, but funny all the same.

Organic Hispanic said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
monica said...

damnit. I forgot I was logged in as ed. retribution will be them all living together (not nearly as witty as what I wrote as "ed"). damn blogger. I hate you sometimes. now my procrastination is taking EVEN LONGER.

Anonymous said...

Oh. Wow. So far, Dimples has not frustrated me that badly with her middle school transition. We've only slightly fought once. I told her that there was no correct answer in the multiple choice for her math homework, and she didn't believe me. I was vindicated the next day when the teacher said that she had made an error on that problem. See, Mom's not so dumb after all...

Monica said...

@whatimeant2say - you are lucky. I think part of it is you have a girl and she has a functioning brain (by all evidence). it's pretty much WWIII over here. daily. to get up and on the bus, to get homework done, to get instruments practiced, to get gym clothes washed and packed again, to not forget his blasted lunch. y'know. i'm figuring somewhere around may he'll get the hang of it. but then again, maybe i'm too hopeful? ;o)