Sunday, September 15, 2013

The Girl Who Lived in a Prophylactic. *Almost* sounds like a movie, right?

Conversation in the Yukon Cornelius.

Girl 1:  Mom, why does Patsy (name changed to protect the innocent) live in a condom?

Me:  Um.  EXCUSE ME?

Girl 1:  Wait.  No, that's not right.  Not a condom.  A condominium.

Me:  Cheesus.  Wait.  Who lives in a condominium???  Sometimes called a CONDO.  NOT TO BE CONFUSED WITH A CONDOM.

Girl 1:  Which, by the way, what is a condom again?

Me:  Can we have this conversation another time?  Please?

Girl 1:  Yes, it's okay, mom.  Anyway I'm pretty sure I know and now I feel just silly for making that mistake, but I'm so glad it was with you and not, y'know, the public?

Me:  Yes.  Me, too.

Girl 1:  So, why does she live in a condo?  That's like those double houses, right?  Oh, wait.  That's complex, right?  Not, like I have a complex, but like she lives in a complex.  Wait.  Is it a complex?  It's something that sounds like condo and complex.

Me:  CHEESUS.  A DUPLEX???

Girl 1:  THAT'S IT!!!  A DUPLEX!!!  Jeez, mom.  What took you so long to say the right word?

8 comments:

Shannon said...

Should we send her a pic of our townhouse here, and let you try and explain the difference between townhouse, apartment complex, duplex, condo and condom? That could be fun! Actually I think C videoed it and sent it to boy child (ignore me sticking my tongue out at the camera - I am all mature that way!!)

Kellie @ Delightfully Ludicrous said...

LOL! I live in a duplex, and not once have I come home and thought "It's nice to be back in the condom".

jamiew said...

she'll be glad to know that you only shared her mistake in a blog, that's not exactly public, right? oh the complexities...

Stephen said...

Durex is a condom brand. Please do not get it mixed up with duplex.

Monica said...

@Shannon - yeah. let's not confuse the girl anymore than necessary. ;o) @kellie - thoughts you hope you will never have. @jamiew - well, my stats are pretty low? @Stephen - you bring a whole new level of confusion to the table. I either forgot I knew that or I never actually knew that.

Anonymous said...

That is hilarious! I totally would have spit my coffee out if I was drinking any when I was reading this! Love it!
~whatimeant2say

Monica said...

@whatimeant2say - girl 1 has the same problem I do. our love of words makes us susceptible to dangerous confusions.

Team Suzanne said...

I think this boils down to a filing issue. Some people file words differently in their brain. Girl 1 hears something else in some words, and files them accordingly. It's a sensory mix up, like people who can taste colors.

Me--I mix up names. There is something that makes Debra and Brenda identical to me. I cannot for the life of me get them separated. But neither has any flavor.