Sunday, December 18, 2011

And the wax gets a shine.

Preface:  I had planned on getting back to you yesterday with all the skinny on M's gaming party, but I am going to bring you this post instead.  (A large part of yesterday was spent recovering from said gaming party because I am older than Abraham.)  As you know, I can barely remember what I ate for breakfast so when I have a great time and meet great people I have to blog about it ASAP or I will forget the entire incident.  I am fairly good at remembering my family, so that is why M's post is going to wait.  Thanks for understanding and I promise to make it up to you.

Last night was hubby's company Christmas Party.  If you are a regular you know that hubby works for a pretty amazing company that knows how to throw a Christmas party.  This year was just as great as last year minus The Janet Jacksonish Wardrobe Malfunction and the Not Free Coffee.  If you did not read that post - garter belts are a must and remember to pay for your purchases.  This year as an added bonus we did not get pulled over!  So yay us!

I have not had a decent night's sleep in weeks, so I am just going to give you a list entitled:

Not Your Regular Office Christmas Party

1.  I wore a dress I got from Goodwill. 
Did it work?  You be the judge.
2.  I got to see hubby in a suit not his scrub-like get-up.  He's a hottie everyday.  He's a Hottie when he wears a suit.
3.  We spent six hours sans children.
4.  The Owner of the Company took time to chat with people in a genuine way.  Not only is he great  for keeping hubby employed so that we can all eat and stuff, he is also great because he said he "enjoys my blog."  (That's not really a direct quote because my mind is a sieve - but it's close enough.)  Say what?  Yes.  Apparently the Owner of a COMPANY has read my blog.  Sa-weet!  Merry Christmas, Owner of Company!
5.  We sat next to a lovely couple, Fred and Ginger (Names changed to protect the innocent.  I think I changed their names.  You know I am REALLY bad with names).  Here's why they were lovely:
  • They had four children as well, so they understood the excitement that comes with being away from home for a company Christmas Party (or for any reason for that matter).
  • .When they asked if I "worked outside the home" they did not use any acronyms.  Nor did they shrink back awkwardly when hubby explained what I do.  By the way, what do I do?
  • When I told Ginger I did not enjoy dancing but did enjoy chair dancing, there *may* have been some confusion around the table about the critical differences between chair dancing and lap dancing.  Then when I explained (don't worry - not in detail) what I meant, instead of thinking I was a total nut, she laughed.
  • Hubby and I doing the fish hook move (or was it just me?) *may* have gotten Fred and Ginger on to the dance floor. 
6.  Hubby got an attractive murse as a Christmas gift.  With his name on it.
Hubby, is that you? 
7.  I got four drink tickets because hubby doesn't drink.  Please and thank you, hubby!
8.  I got to eat food that I didn't have to cook without the interruption of four small people incessantly asking me for crap stuff.
9.  Virginia (hubby's supervisor) was hubby's dance partner for the dance competition, not me!  I am one body part from neck to knees, so dancing is not my friend (see #5).  Hubby, on the other hand, is Plastic Man from the 70's.  Sadly, they did not win the dance competition.  It was not for lack of trying.  Awesome dancing Virginia and hubby!
Hubby doing the "warm up" to the competition.
10.  The incident with the Brazilian Wax won hubby the Mr. Clean Award!  Yes!  Not only did Hubby's ironic naivete make great blog fodder, it paid off for us! 

That's my list bloggy peeps.  I can really only think of one thing I don't like about hubby's company Christmas party.  It only comes once a year.  Countdown:  Seven.  Happy day!


jamiew said...

Yes, that totally worked! Glad Eddie is continuing the winning streak and I so want to borrow that murse!

Hines-Sight said...

You look great. Glad you had a good time, and I don't think I knew you had four children. Wow! That's a lot. :)

Shannon said...

1. Where are dresses like that when I go to Goodwill? Seriously you find all the good stuff.
2. I want a pic of E with the nurse. LOL!
3. Glad you had a good time!
4. Can't wait for M's party post.
5. This one is just so there were 5 things on the list! LOL!

Fred and Ginger said...

We had a great time with you guys! And for those that may be wondering (It's possible!), our names are Clive and Julianna Bixby

Monica said...

@j.w. - YOU are hired. permanently. payment? lots and lots of baked goods. @hines-sight - bless you. yes, we have four small ones. that *could* be why i am a teensy bit insane. ;o) @shannon - we simply must shop goodwill next time. xoxoxoxoxoxo. @FRED AND GINGER - hahahahaha. you are so kind for leaving a comment, not being totally creeped at being blogged, and having such a collectively witty sense of humor. until next christmas!

Shannon said...

LOL! I was just rereading what I wrote and stupid autocorrect changed "murse" to "nurse" Sorry! So just to be clear I want to see E with his "murse" not with a "nurse."

And I am totally in for a shopping trip to Goodwill.

Fred and/or Ginger or perhaps Clive and/or Julianna said...

You guys are a hoot! Hope we don't have to wait a whole year to hang out again.

Monica said...

@shannon - i totally knew you meant "murse," and figured it was auto-correct - but now that you mention it - seeing ed with his "nurse" might be interesting. ;o) course it might also piss me off. ;o) i miss you and am so happy we might be together NEXT christmas. xoxo CLIVE and JULIANNA - such great names (and i am embarrassed to say i had to google it) - don't be strangers. you can always find me/us here. :o)

Ginger/Julianna said...

Monica, don't be embarrassed about not recognizing our names...we were only featured in two valentine episodes of a hysterical sitcom. You can see a few of our funniest one liners in this clip.

PS- It really was a great party, and your company was awesome. Love your blog- your sense of humor and your relatable writing. Guess I'll have to make a real google account and leave the role-playing for special occasions with Clive. :)