Thursday, January 20, 2011

When "no lice" is your happy spot is it time to quit?

So, today is the third (?) anniversary of my 29th birthday - or something like that.  Good thing I am not sure I believe "you are as young as you feel" because today I feel about 78. 

I had planned to go for a great run this morning after dropping baby off at MDO, grab a yummy (free because I still have SB dollars) coffee at Starbucks, go to the library to return movies and check out new books, go to the bank to withdraw money for our transmission (um, yuck), and then come home read my new books, possibly web surf, make myself a chocolate candy bar pie, and then go pick up all my kids.  Did I say that's what I had planned?

Fast forward to what actually happened.

Yesterday I made a poor decision to shower late - hours after doing a work out that involved a heavy (although bulimic) baby.  That is why I was 25 minutes late to pick up bubba who had a fever of 102 and why I feel like I have been hit by a truck today.  After picking up bubba and stopping by Walgreens (because I never have medicine when I actually need it) the day took a sharp turn toward hell.

The girls got off the bus and one of them had a fever of 101.8.  The other said her throat was starting to hurt.  In the meantime I had been informed that LICE (collective - EWWWWWWWWWWW!) was making its way through our neighborhood.  So, I had the chopsticks ready to examine the girls as soon as they bounded off the bus.  Needless to say they were overjoyed to have to endure the examination while not feeling great.  Did I tell you how much I hate lice and how it freaks me out?  For me, lice are right up there with rats, opossums, and cockroaches.  No matter that no one in my family has ever actually had lice.  The mere thought that it could bring us down in a matter of minutes terrifies me.

I don't think anyone has lice in our family and that may be the good news of the day.  Yeah, it doesn't seem right to take the temperature of the day by assessing your lice status, but that seems where we are headed.

After lice exams I made the kids (because I may be able to see into the future) hop in the shower for a good head scrubbing.  They protested since it was only 5:00 and we hadn't eaten dinner.  I said, "GET IN.  And, dinner???  Are you crazy???"

Just because I was feeling industrious I decided to throw in a load of washcloths that needed bleaching (yeah, this is where you want to pay attention) while I was supervising said head scrubbing.  I threw them in and quickly bounded back up the stairs.

I am not sure I can publish word for word the next thing that happened because it would probably prevent me from posting to Facebook, but just know that my husband got home from work, entered the downstairs back door, stepped into roughly an inch of standing water and started screaming various questions and exclamations up the stairs.  It was then that we realized we had a washing machine problem.

Good thing I started bathing the kids at 5:00, eh?  It didn't sound so crazy when they were still wandering around like zombie, sickie children at 8:00 while hubby and I were frantically bailing out the downstairs like it was the Titanic.  We ran out of "dog towels" so we had to start using our "good" towels (I say that loosely since I can't remember the last time I actually bought new towels), so now ALL of our towels (dog and human) are a washed out color and smell strongly of............bleach.  Yeah for us!  Someday when we have "extra money" I can add all new towels to the list of stuff to buy.

Hubby and I finished throwing sopping towels out the backdoor, rearranging the frig and the computer table, kissing the kids goodnight, taking temperatures, dispensing medication, calling repairmen, rechecking for lice, and cleaning up remaining spots of water somewhere around 8:45.  My throat was starting to hurt by then and I had developed the cough I have now.

So, happy birthday to me.  Someday this will be funny.  Right now I am going to reheat my coffee, assess the kitchen, see what damage the sickies are doing, and wait on the repairman.  Hell, if I am feeling industrious (although now I know the dangers of this) I may even recheck for lice and shower.  Then again, maybe not.


Shannon said...

No lice would totally be my happy thought today but I was so distracted by the roaches and ants that I forgot to do a head check on the kids. Good news is I have boys if there are any bugs in their hair we are shaving heads.

Do you remember when my washer overflowed and flooded both boys bedrooms and I ended up kicking the screens out of the bedrooms and chunking soaked towels, blankets and stuffed animals out the window into my gardens? You thought I was nuts and laughed your ass off. Do you get it now?

Monica said...

it's the seal and bearing. boo. 300 hundred to fix. trust me - i am not laughing now and i apologize PROFUSELY for ever finding that funny. ;o) may post pics of a new washer soon.....or not.

jamiew said...

I have dog towels if you need anymore. I have dogs if you need those too.
I think maybe this birthday should get a do-over.

Monica said...

yes - total and complete do over. when we have money - - which may actually not be until my NEXT birthday. or AFTER that. ;o)

Becky said...

Man what a day. I agree. You should get a bday do over in about a week.

Monica said...

thanks, friends. it ended early (which is good and bad) because i was achy all over and the kids were all in bed. baby was up most of the night coughing, but i strangely feel better today??? don't know how long that feeling will last - i hope long enough for me to get five loads of laundry done with fixed washer. ;o)

Jae said...

ugh girl - i've been checking my girl for lice too - trust me! i hate it. been there once, done it.

i agree w/Jamie - this birthday deserves a do over. better yet, just skip it and pretend it never happened.

Monica said...

oh, and it's been the birthday that keeps on giving. the penicillan is making me feel slightly better although now the five us (ed's too mean to be sick) sound like dogs barking "jingle bells" when we cough.

Becky said...

Man, that stinks. I hope you guys are all better soon.