Monday, March 30, 2009

feels like a monday to me

I haven't blogged in a LONG time due to many factors. None of which have to do with writer's block, since only great writers get that, and I am decidedly not a very good writer. Good writers would have taken all the chaos that has been my life since February and published a great book with it. I instead have avoided the computer like the plague. Well, leave it to this day to break the spell...

The weekend past was not all that great to begin with, so expecting that today, MONDAY would bring any salvation was a long stretch. But, I dared to think it anyway. The weekend was a mix of joy and pain: A cancelled fire pit due to high winds. One hellaciously scary poopy diaper that required laundering and bathing (her not me, although I considered it). A strange turn of events in which a jar with NO BOTTOM got put in the cupboard and I poured tomato sauce into it. That turned the kitchen into a thick, saucy mess and left me virtually paralyzed and wondering what the hell had just happened. Laundry, laundry, laundry and then more laundry after the tomato sauce. That's all I can remember. I think I blocked the rest out to save my sanity.

So...like I said. Expecting today to be grand was probably a long stretch. I woke up made breakfast, lunches, and went walking. Not half bad for a Monday. I considered a shower, but decided I would have plenty of time later for that. I made the baby cereal with bananas and that seemed harmless. I forgot to tightly screw the bottle top back in place on the bottle, though. (This is an important point for later.) I made plans to have a much needed (after the not-so-great weekend) playdate with a friend and her kids. After C. asked for the 50th time, "Is it almost time for our playdate?" I decided to forgo my shower and hair wash in order to just get to the damn playdate. I tried to quickly feed baby her bottle (the one with said loose top). In a matter of seconds formula leaked all over both of us. When I say "all over" I mean I had formula in my bra and she had it in her bellybutton. Shower back on...hair dirty one more day. C. screaming, "IS IT TIME TO GO TO THE PLAYDATE YET?"

We finally get to the playdate at 11:30 a.m. We have to leave at 12:30 because C. has speech. So, we play, talk, and eat quickly. Mostly the girls fight. Joy. I am keeping my friend's kids at 1:40ish for about an hour. That's fine - I welcome the diversion. Back home at 12:30, C. off to speech. Baby in bed at 1:00 for first nap of the day. My friend leaves her kids - her girl child throws a huge fit and wakes baby. Baby back up at 1:30. Baby CRANKY. Friend's girl child now sound asleep on my couch. Yay. My daughter gets back home from speech. She and my friend's boy play for about five minutes in which time baby is screaming for a bottle and the boy pees. His mom did not bring clothes for him. No problem. I will pop him in some of M's clothes. As I am trying to get the clothes, and feed baby her bottle he finishes peeing on the bathroom floor and the phone rings. M.'s piano teacher is leaving a message that there is an emergency and my friend's boy is standing in about one inch of pee in my bathroom. And baby is still screaming for her bottle. Against my better judgment I answer the phone. Can we change our piano to 3:15 instead of 4:30 on Wednesday? Not a problem I say while baby is screaming in my ear for her bottle back, my friend's boy is still standing in pee, and now my C. has gotten out some permanent ink stampers and is stamping on what I hope is paper on the kitchen table.

I get off the phone, put baby down, clean up the pee, get him in clean clothes, take away the stampers, get baby again, and check the calendar. I'll be damned if M. doesn't have a dental appointment at 3:00 on Wednesday. What are the chances of that???

At that exact moment I said good-bye to Monday. The rest of the day was downhill. Tomorrow will be better (how can it be worse???). The bathroom smells like bleach, my hair smells really bad, and I have to be two places at once on Wednesday. I will take some advice from today and wash my hair and shower first thing.

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